Most weight loss journeys seem to start in childhood but I was a skinny kid growing up who didn't need to watch a single thing I ate. I was very active, not in a work out kind of way, but in a sports teams/always outside/spent summers lakeside kind of way.

Then I moved out to go to university and I went from my Mom's cooking to cafeteria food, a lot of activity to long days of studying spent at a desk, and copious amounts of Moosehead Dry. The weight started to come on, no big deal at first but 40 lbs later it was affecting my soccer game, etc.

My weight jumped up a few more times for different reasons:
(1) I ate my way through a crappy relationship
(2) I got a desk job that had me even more sedentary
(3) I had a baby and gained weight afterwards because I went from 24/7 nausea to "FOOD IS AWESOME AGAIN!! ** snarf **

I ate what I wanted, when I wanted. I resented those who clearly watched what they ate. I kidded myself constantly about what I was eating and rationalized every bite into something I was entitled to have. Each pound made me that much more miserable and what do I do when I'm miserable? Eat, of course. I wanted help but after many failed attempts at Weight Watchers, eDiets and Jenny Craig I was very wary of forking over another penny to any kind of center for help.

I reached a breaking point in January 2011. My doctor informed me I'd have to go on Lipitor because cholesterol was 249 and that it would be "a shame because [I didn't] have to be in this position..." Everything hurt: my back, my hips, my feet, my pride, my sense of self worth. I was done with being fat, once and for all. She recommended the HMR program at Alegent Health. I went to the intro class and after that hour I was convinced, for the first time, that I could really - REALLY - lose weight. I went into the program forgetting everything I thought I knew about food and for the first time I just listened and took it all in. There was no negotiating, no "buts" or "ifs". I just did it. And the fat started to disappear.

I have about 30 lbs to go but that won't happen without adequate exercise. I have been remiss with the PA side of this program but no longer. My educator, Shana, is going to introduce me to the world of strength training without the superior and punitive attitude of a personal trainer. I look forward to getting my muscle on!!